The Unseen Here and Now . . .

ARCHIVES

Stuart Revercomb

Stuart Revercomb is a marketing consultant and joyously married father of four children. He seems to remember someone once telling him he ought to be a writer. "The Unseen Here and Now" -- Thursdays.

E-MAIL

March 22, 2001

Dodging Reality

Quick. What was your favorite gym class "sport" while growing up?

Yes that's right ! Mine too!

The answer is Dodgeball of course. Or as it is known in other circles : "Killerball", "Murderball" or "Bombardment". We called it "Warball" which seems to pretty much capture the spirit of the thing - which is to bean as many of your enemy as hard as humanly possible with a small, often overinflated red rubber ball.

My classmates and I played this game with a passion - and not just because "crab soccer" was one of the likely alternatives. Crab Soccer as far as we were concerned was invented by some sadistic Phys-Ed teacher who was more interested in having his floor's cleaned with our posteriors than he was with teaching any real physical skill - like picking your nemesis off with a cross court shot to the side of the head with one of those little red vulcanized balls.

Now that took talent. And several of us got pretty darn good at it. But the problem with War Ball was that no matter how many people were good enough to reasonably defend themselves, there was about an equal number of kids who were little more than lambs being led to the slaughter. Alliances were made, deals struck and contracts negotiated for milk money, but somehow there were always a few less than athletic individuals left cowering in the corner, fearing more than a little for their safety if not their lives.

And if you were ever a child, (some people apparently haven't been), you know how forgiving they can be.

Generally we unleashed everything we had at them, unless by grace or some other means of divine intervention we found a reason to take pity - lobbing a shot mercifully in their direction so that they could receive the shallow blow and run terrified from the field of play. Cute girls rarely got plastered. The less than adorable one that had ratted on you for making too much noise in the library was taking her chances.

There was always War Ball coming up next period.

Lately "Dodgeball" has come under significant fire from critics who point to the game's "latent violence and unfairness." They also say that it encourages the "best to pick on the weak and to be glorified for doing so." A recent article in the Chicago Tribune highlights the efforts of one Neil Williams - a Physical Education Teacher at "Eastern Connecticut State University", who while confessing to being a "great dodge ball player in his youth" has included the game on a list he calls the "The Physical Education Hall of Shame". The list also includes : Kickball, Relay Races, "Musical Chairs", "Red Rover" and "Duck, Duck Goose".

Duck, Duck Goose? Give me a break. You're going to give condoms to Eighth graders but they can't play Duck, Duck Goose? My Grandmother would slap that guy silly and probably have something to say about the large contributions that the "Great University of Eastern Connecticut State" has made to the world as well. She might not always be right, but I wouldn't argue with her on this one.

Truthfully, games such as Dodgeball can be pretty tough on kids who aren't particular proficient at them. But I'm not sure if the game itself or any of the others on the list are inherently bad. Whether you're playing Dodgeball or Basketball, most kids learn to deal with the fact that they are not particularly good at some, if not all sports - hopefully reaching the conclusion that of the gifts they've been given "this" just isn't one of them.

Dodgeball "supporters", (can you believe there is such a thing?), respond that Dodgeball parallels life and that the "game incorporates the same philosophy that coaches and business people use in trying to beat their competitors - you look at the competition, you find the weakness in their presentation and you exploit it."

I'm not sure if finding weaknesses in others and exploiting them is any way to go through life, but the point is taken when it comes to how one must approach ones competitors. As a fellow co-worker used to say, "Da business - she's not always pretty..."

But defenders who rely on such statements really miss the best and most inspiring lessons of competitive youth sports - the ones that reflect some of the more subtle truths in life for both "winners" and "losers."

The self sacrifice displayed by those willing to literally "take a hit" for someone else.

The creativity of mutual friends to catch each others shots so that neither of them have to face the guys that take the "sport" far more seriously than they do.

The reality of several less than gifted kids learning to work together to defend themselves from those who would otherwise dominate "the game".

While no one will ever remember the perfect shot made by a top player, they will likely never forget the time that the last knock kneed weakling cowering in the corner mustered the courage to miraculously catch the "champions ball" - knocking him out of the game to the thunderous and uproarious applause of everyone in the gym.

That's the stuff that life is made of Mr. Williams. Its not always pretty and its not always fun - and certainly not always fair. But it beats the heck out of Crab Soccer, where everyone crawls along awkwardly at about the same pace in an effort to do something "safely" but not particular satisfying to anyone - except maybe the guy that cleans the floors.

And as my dear Grandmother is want to say : "If the floor is always clean - chances are nothing worth experiencing has been going on above it."